Clean bed linen and safe people

One of the most comforting and snuggle-inducing memories of my childhood are the evenings when the bed linen had just been changed and I could crawl in bed and just draw deep breaths smelling the crispness and cleanness of my sheets. Especially if it was early autumn, and they had dried outside in the wind, smelling of sunshine and of coming autumn... mmh!

I think that the people I instantly feel close to have something similar about them. They have been through various cycles of life, involving a lot of cleansing and tumbling and shaking and drying, but the outcome is that the dirt is out, they smell nice, and even when you snuggle close, they are still safe and clean.

With people, though, the definition of clean doesn't mean someone who has never had any dirt in their lives, that would exclude all of us. I think the safe-and-clean category is made of people who don't cling to their dirt, who are open and willing to be clean (and cleansed) and who are mindful of what makes relationships safe: trust, respect, kindness, acceptance...

I want excitement and adventures probably more than most people, but that's just outer stuff. I like reckless (within limits :) BUT the people I want closest in my life are like the bed linen of my childhood. They are safe to be with!

The other thing I associate that snuggly feeling with is flannel, the kind of flannel the shirts my Dad used to wear were made of. It is unbeatable!, and so for years I had the best of both worlds: flannel bed linen :) It is the absolute tops on cold winter nights... I wonder what the equivalent in people would look like... ;)

Beautiful people - they are everywhere

Lately I've been really impressed with the beauty of people in general. I find it absolutely astonishing that the world is so full-packed with such amounts of beauty, lavishly poured out everywhere.

And there are so many ways of being beautiful too. The other day I was watching my parents, already old, walking hand in hand down the street, both quite wrinkly and with a physical problem or two, but wearing their dark dark sun glasses, like some retired Men in Black -couple :) I'm pretty sure they dont' see what I see when I look at them, but in my eyes they are SO beautiful.

To mention another one, I was reading the blog of a friend of mine. And she is just doing such an incredibly good job bringing up her son as a single mom. Such beauty of action, of life, of daring to invest in someone, even when its really taxing. I'm not sure she sees what I see in her... the grace-in-action that she embodies... but the way she goes about it IS beautiful.

Generosity is beautiful. Maybe that's why I see so much beauty around me, it seems that I'm surrounded with such bighearted people, who share out of kindness, not because they have too much...

Today as I was having lunch with a very dear friend, the waitress' eyes were just sparkling at the thought that she could treat us to freshly baked bread and butter... in the midst being very busy, such generous care and kindness. Again, I was really touched by the beauty of her gesture.

I think most people are quite beautiful, if one has eyes to see. I'm also convinced that it probably is a secret that they themselves are not aware of... the way a girl listened to her friend looking so intent, or the way a father holds his son's hand when they get on the tram, or the way a young girls skirt was moving as she walked... beauty everywhere, in words, movements, forms, colours, shapes, and sometimes even ruins of various kinds can be beautiful, or tell a story of great beauty and strength. I'm thinking of a few sagging tummies and other parts, some varicose veins and puffed eyes, all "ruins" if looked from the outside, but for those who have eyes to see, they a signs of love, and of daring and of giving generously of yourself to and for the next generation...

Beauty might be in the eye of the beholder, so may we all walk with open eyes!